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JOSH LEVISON ( 010 » 046 )
ᴛᴇxᴛ | ᴠᴏɪᴄᴇ | ᴠɪᴅᴇᴏ | ᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴ

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I BEG YOUR PARDON. I've a perfectly fine life. And I've a number of impressive qualities, you know, that some might want to steal for themselves.

[ george please

hope please ]

Right, like making bourguignon in space and very possibly trying to sniff your own butt once a month.

[ this is somehow more self-deprecating humor than humor at george's expense, but the distinction is probably a little fuzzy. ]

[josh]

1. I HAVE NEVER TRIED TO DO THAT. 2. DOGS/WOLVES DO NOT DO THAT. 3. HAVE YOU EVER EVEN MET A DOG IN YOUR LIFE. THEY SNIFF OTHER DOGS.

[ what ]

The lady doth protest too much.

If you've never filmed it, how do you know what it does and doesn't get up to? I'm just saying, I don't think werewolves are known for their sense of propriety.

Because, GENERALLY SPEAKING, it is a bit too busy trying to DESTROY INANIMATE OBJECTS to, I suspect, sniff itself.

Right.
You're saying you never feel off the next morning? You know, weird tastes, upset stomach.

Which comes from eating squirrels or chairs or drywall or something, not from an excess of sniffing.

Now I'm starting to wonder if you've ever been near a dog in your life.

Well the eating things bit is the wolf.

My neighbor's dog used to eat his own poo.

[ just putting it out there. ]

I HAVE NEVER EATEN MY OWN POO

Right, okay, so I'm sensing this is a sore topic.
Back to cooking, maybe?

Oh, brilliant Poo -> cooking NOW YOU'VE RUINED COOKING

Compartmentalization, look it up. At least I didn't put them in the same text.

No, no, of course You've just associated them REALLY JOSH

Does this mean the dinner's cancelled

No, no, we'll just alter the menu so that we eat each other's poop Since that's apparently WHAT WE DO

I feel like you're taking this very personally.
Tell you what, delete the texts, pretend it never happened.

And then I'll hit myself in the head (so I forget).

Let me know if you're accepting volunteers.

[ this is fondness, george!!!!! ]

To be hit in the head? Might help a bit.

Remind me next time I see you. Should probably take care of it sooner than later, I don't want a concussed chef in the kitchen.

No, hold on, YOU'RE getting hit. We are in agreement there, correct?

I was aiming more for "volunteering to hit you". You know, go the brain damage route to spare you the memory of this conversation.

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